:Laguna Beach:White Wine:

Before a long trip, I find extreme joy in creating a mixed CD. I don’t have an iPod adaptor for that exact reason. Sure, I can make a playlist, but putting 18 or 19 or 20 songs out of my whole 7,000+ song music library is incredibly satisfying. Before I went to Laguna Beach Saturday night, that is precisely what I did.

Laguna Beach was beautiful when my parents visited me in college, and it will always be beautiful. A cute little beach community tucked away down a canyon. Although I do love that community, I neglected to remind myself before walking out my Studio City door that just because I was wearing a sweater did not mean it would keep me warm. Boy was it freezing out there! After we arrived to our destination I was okay though, as it was crowded and everyone seemed to want to dance to rap music from our college days (which obviously I have NO problem with). I was having a great time with old friends with my light colored beer when I noticed a serious problem approaching, maybe multiple problems now that I think about it.

Problem #1

Middle aged man in a white t-shirt and black puffy vest making eye contact with me. Then smiling. Now don’t get me wrong, I love smiling, but being that he was seemingly much older than me I wasn’t really smiling back. While I was thinking about smiling back (just to be nice), I noticed…

Problem #2

This middle aged fashion unconscious man was carrying a glass of red wine. First of all, this bar was clearly a college bar. I am never opposed to drinking wine at any bar, but red wine? With everyone dancing?

He began to approach and all I could think about was that glass of wine. It’s all I could look at. That and down at my crisp cream colored sweater. As he approached I heard the word “beautiful” (thanks, but no thanks bud) and tried not to make eye contact. He then proceeded to ask me why I was “so shy” and it took all of my might not to push him out of my way. If I had pushed him out of my way, that red wine would have been all over my sweater.

As I was coming in from outside with my friends (that rap music is getting loud for these almostlatetwentysomething ears) he was right by the door. I could practically hear the waves inside of his wine glass. And then, I imagined drinking red wine, which I am not a fan of unless it is light and airy. While imagining drinking red wine, I imagined sand paper, dryness and musk. That is what I think about when I think about red wine. I know it is supposed to have undertones of chocolate or raspberry or strawberry or blahblahblah but that just does not fly with me.

Now, the middle aged man appeared to be waving at me. Now we have a problem, I thought to myself as I saw the waves going up toward the rim of the glass. I turned to my friend and, having to yell, I said “Get him away from me”. Now I don’t know if he did or did not hear, but 5 minutes later I saw him chatting up some bleach blonde who was probably years younger than me and could probably care less about red wine.

I didn’t really mind that the guy didn’t know I was basically just trying to avoid a messy spill. I probably would not have talked to him anyway though.

I am definitely taking this opportunity to tell you all why white wine is one of my VIV’s (Very Important Vices):

1. Most of what white wine can be paired with is either healthy or delectable. Dessert wines (Riesling, Moscato) can go with a fruity confection after dinner. White wine is also recommended with fish and chicken, both of which are good for you. Disclaimer: I LOVE STEAK. But I will still drink white wine with it.

2. It is more refreshing than red wine, especially in the summer, which is my favorite season. It is a year round, weather round wine.

3. White wine does not create dry mouth.

4.  After a glass of white wine there are no lip stains, no tooth discolorations. <– = pearly whites + stunning photos. No staining!

5. If spilled, the worst that will happen is that you will smell like white wine it when it dries. If you are out and red wine is spilled on your new sweater, light or dark, it will not only smell worse but the stain will be more noticeable. Tide to Go won’t fix it (unless it is the size of an edamame bean).

Being from Sonoma County, I belong to the I’m a Wino for Life Club. Everyone obviously has their own tastes. But if you are out at a “yo girl, let me get up in your grill” kind of a dance bar/club, please steer clear of red wine.

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